This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Randomize
