Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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