We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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