DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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