I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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