I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize