Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
