do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
