Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
