It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
