rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
