if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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