If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
As shirtless as possible
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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