my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
