I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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