hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
the condom got lost in my hair
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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