I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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