What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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