Heybabeimwearingurpanties
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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