We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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