i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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