I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
