So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
