Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Randomize
