Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
