Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
