Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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