Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
My penis needs a shock collar
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
