and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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