Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
