how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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