THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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