I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
