he thought i was a dude.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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