Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Tornado booty call.. dedication
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
