when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
