David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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