Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize