our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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