Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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