Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
