Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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