when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Randomize
