walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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