She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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