when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
