Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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