either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
