i think my mom watched the whole time
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
