I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
