Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
