Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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